If you have read articles or heard from others about the benefits of divorcing through mediation, you may have been optimistic that your divorce could have the same positive dissolution. Mediation is growing in popularity because more couples are realizing they do not have to drag their conflicts through the court system, but can resolve them more civilly with the help of a trained and experienced mediator.
You may have been enthusiastic about divorce mediation, but things are not going as you expected. Perhaps you are not feeling the sense of calm you hoped to have, compared to the agitation you assumed a litigated divorce would bring. Maybe the process is going much more slowly and grudgingly than you anticipated. Is it time to give up on mediation and head for court?
Reaching an impasse
If you understand mediation, you know that you may not get your way on every issue. Mediation is about coming to agreements together, making compromises and working through the most difficult issues, such as child custody, property division and support. It will not always be calm and quiet, and you may even have a heated discussion along the way, but a skilled mediator can help you untangle the emotions and stay focused on forward progress. However, you may feel mediation is not working if any of the following occurs:
- You and your spouse are stuck on one issue and can't reach a resolution or move past it.
- Your spouse continues to stray off topic.
- Your spouse is using the time to vent his or her grievances against you.
- Hours have passed without reaching a single agreement.
If you and your spouse have reached a compromise on any of the issues you planned to discuss, you may be making some headway. You may be unable to resolve one or two issues and have to seek a judge's opinion, but any progress you make in mediation can reduce the time, aggravation and money you may have to spend in court.
Whether you are going through mediation or litigation, you would benefit from sound legal advice and representation from a skilled and experienced Florida negotiator. Such advice may prevent you from giving up too soon and may also help you avoid sacrificing too many of your rights. Seeking assistance from an attorney can provide you with an advocate to help you achieve your goals for your divorce.